Here are the questions I’ve been asking in coaching calls with managers and individual contributors alike, to get a gut check on how folks are feeling during this awful, strange season—without making the conversation too heavy.

What’s been working for you so far?

What’s been hardest?

(Or: what’s been the most surprising thing?)

What’s your north star right now?

(Or: what are you optimizing for during this unusual time?)

If you’re talking to a manager or leader: What feedback have you gotten on your leadership during this time?

What’s one thing you want to experiment with right now?

And here are some tips on how to ask these questions, straight from the brilliant mind of Paloma Medina:

Ask them to expand on their answer so you can understand their underlying core needs:

If they say “I am really worried about this deadline!” ask them to expand: “Oh, say more about that…” or “Ah, which part do you think is the most likely to lead to that?”

ALWAYS confirm with them if your inference is correct:

For example, “So, if you and I checked in more frequently over Slack, you would feel better about this, did I get that right?”